We do so many things to make our families and friends happy, but we tend to put ourselves last? Don’t we deserve to take care of ourselves? While expressing our thoughts, affection, and anger we mostly never hold ourselves back. But why is it that when it comes to resentment we cannot express ourselves. I have come across so many people who do not even reckon that they feel resentful towards a person for so many years, until something really drastic happens to them such as a dreaded disease. Yes resentment is a very horrible feeling which just clutters our systems and blocks us from receiving joy. What about guilt? We do tend to feel guilty for doing or not doing things that other tell us to do. Nonetheless, this is just a thought pattern that we have grown up with as our parents and surroundings have always taught us what to do and what not to do. They do what best they know and believe that as we grow we will understand right from wrong. Nonetheless this thought pattern continues within us and prevents us from refusing people as we are scared of being judged or criticized. These assumptions are what lead us to live a life that we wouldn’t want to live. All of us want a free and happy life, so that we would have free movements to do what we feel like! But naturally commitments and responsibilities hold us back and we wait for a tomorrow that never comes. We often hear ourselves and other saying, “one day I will do this or one day I will accomplish this.”-but who has seen tomorrow?
NOW IS THE MOMENT we need to grasp and make the most out of. Our past is gone and the future is yet to come so why not enjoy every moment of this present? Why to wait for a tomorrow that may never come or even if it does it might be very different to a tomorrow that you had imaged. If you think that your problems will be sorted out in the future and you will be freer to do what you want, you might be mistaken. Yes, everything does come at its right time but there are some things are very much in our hands, such as self-love. Who is there to judge us? We often run away from all those people who criticize us, and our escape is holding feelings of resentment towards them. We believe that this frustration makes us strong and covers up from that bad feeling that they create in us through their taunting words. The only way to deal with it is to love yourself, and by this I do not mean being selfish to a point of hurting others. In fact when we truly love ourselves we cannot even think of hurting anyone. So let them make noise and eventually they will surely bow down in front of your happiness and inner peace. Personally speaking I used to be extremely sensitive towards anyone’s comments and this used to lead to self-hatred. For years on an end I believed that I had no good qualities and was totally worthless because I chose to listen to all those people. What I failed to understand back then, was that they too had something missing in their lives and felt helpless, but as they did not know what to do deal with this void, they took out their frustration by nagging at me. After all asking for help is no form of weakness and requires a lot of strength as one has to surpass his/her ego and denial points.
As a result it is essential asking yourself every day how are you doing and if there is anything bothering you, what can you do about it. This is a consciousness that we all gifted with, hence healing starts from within. Until we do not heal ourselves people will continuously pester us because they do notice that insecurity and self-criticism in us. You will be surprised to know how clearly others can see the lack of self-worth in you through your actions and behavior. What do you want to portray to the world? That you are weak and need someone to tell you how good and lovable you are? Ask yourself this question and in time an answer will come from within. And the answer will be that NO, you do not require anyone to tell you this because deep inside you already know it. We have been born with this ability to heal our body and thoughts. I do not mention feelings here as feelings are temporary and are in our control. Yes you heard it right! They are in our control as we can understand why we are feeling in a certain manner and try to change it. Of course there are all instances when we do not know the cause behind a sudden feeling of restlessness or anxiety, but then we can just accept it as a temporary feeling and do something to change it. For example, I listen to my favorite song or watch a comedy show. You will be astonished how the simplest things can automatically lift your energies in a matter of seconds. So stop being so hard on yourself and begin to love yourself. Remove all those layers of self-criticism, pity and resentment and begin to experience the beautiful journey of loving thyself!